Saturday, February 7, 2009

Spinning Apart

Every now and then the things that I believe in suddenly seem to lose their meaning. I spin apart, so fast that bits and pieces of me are torn away until suddenly I realize that in my effort to get as far away from myself as I can, I have lost too much. And maybe I wish to forget the pieces that I lost, maybe I did not hold on to them as I should and that is the reason that circumstances were able to tear them from me. If I could stop, if I could find stillness for just one moment sometimes I think I might recover...something.  But the terrain of my life has changed and even if I could recover them, the pieces no longer fit. So I continue to run crossing lines I never thought to cross, and with each new crossing I search out every reason to be gone, convincing myself there's nothing here to hold onto.

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